Welcome back to 1 out of 5 – Would Recommend, where I never read a calendar before planning my blogs. Seeing as today is the first day of October, 1st of the 31 nights of Halloween, I’ve pushed back the JSA’s other media history in favor of Shock-Rock legend Alice Cooper’s one and only starring film role, 1986’s Monster Dog!
What’s The Plot?
Up-and-coming rock star Vincent Raven returns to his childhood home with his girlfriend and her film crew to shoot a music video for one of his new songs. There are only two problems with this plan: First, there’s a pack of wild dogs that’s terrorizing the countryside, tearing people apart. Second, Vincent’s father was murdered 20 years ago my neighbors who believed him to be a werewolf and the fact that Vince is back in town at the same time that dogs have started running wild does not go unnoticed by them…
Who Made This Beautiful Garbage?
“They told me it would never get released in the movie houses, and I said, ‘Great. It should just be one of those movies you can rent at the video place.’ And they said that’s what it would be, so I did it … I got a lot of money for it [laughs]. I think I was the biggest part of the budget
Five Reasons To See It
- The lead actress in Vincent’s music video does a terrific job of staying in character until the song is over. This is despite seeing a bloodied corpse leaning up against a 2nd story window. It isn’t until it crashes through and lands on her that she loses her composure and breaks character.
- Alice Cooper does his own singing but very obviously is dubbed speaking by another actor. Which is probably for the best, since Alice is acting ability when not singing is questionable at best.
- No two residents of Vincent Raven’s hometown have the same regional accent.
- The opening song, “Identity Crisises“, does a great job of both sounding Alice Cooper adjacent but distinct from Alice Cooper’s music. In this way, and really only this way, it’s like Lady Gaga’s songs in the most recent a Star is Born.
- “Sheriff Morris, I remember you. I used to sit on your lap and piss all over your pants, right?” – How Vincent Raven remembers the chief lawman of his hometown.
Review
I’m sure you’re shocked to hear that Claudio Fragasso made a movie that’s not particularly good. That said, fans of Alice will get a kick out of seeing play the lead in a horror flick (even if it ain’t his voice for most of it) and fans of schlocky 80s VHS horror will find it to be an enjoyable romp.
